Monday, July 03, 2006

Tennis Trivia

Wimbledon tournament is underway in London. London is where the Queen lives, in her palace, built on the banks of the Buckingham Canal.

Unfortunately, Leander and Mahesh are not partnering each other this time. It is no secret that they are unable to get along. Leander accuses Mahesh of not picking up his share of the bill whenever they have a Dutch meal together. Yes, apparently Leander Paes, but Mahesh doesn’t.

Mahesh Bhupati got married two years back to a girl from Chennai, by name Shweta Jaishankar. After marriage, as per convention, she changed her name to Shweta Bhu-patni.

Another Indian taking part in the tournament is Sania Mirza. But, what’s the use? She can never be the winner of any event nor first in any race. She can only be the runner-up. That’s because she hails from Second-rabad.

Do you know what happened to all the players who retired from the game? I know what some of them are up to. John McEnroe manufactures tennis equipment. Even in his playing days, he used to have guts and make quite a racket. Jim has started his own Courier service. While our own Amritraj has become a video-jockey. VJ Amritraj, he calls himself.

And, remember Ramesh Krishnan and his painfully slow service. One of the serves that he sent down in the year 1987 is yet to cross the net and go over to the other side. But still people used to say, “Ramesh is not at all boring to watch. Bore is Becker.”

Some people are under the impression that Lillee had taken part in Wimbledon. This is not correct. He was Dennis Lillee, not Tennis Lillee.

Players of an earlier generation, such as Fred Perry and Lacoste are selling T-shirts. These branded T-shirts are very expensive, let me warn you. But, if you go to Janpath market in Delhi, you can pick up Lacoste-labelled T shirts for Rs 50/- each. Only difference is that these are low-cost shirts, not Lacoste. One Janpath wholesaler kept demanding a quota of 27% for these T-shirts in every showroom, till someone gently pointed out that quotas were applicable only for low-caste T-shirts, not for low-cost ones.

Wimbledon spectators love tradition. They cannot watch a match without their strawberries dipped in cream. What they don’t realize is that the word 'strawberry' is a misnomer. It is not a berry at all, because it has seeds outside, whereas true berries must have seeds inside. To complicate matters, tomato is not a vegetable, but a berry. What’s worse, ‘ladies finger’ is not a part of the female anatomy, but is a vegetable. Why can’t things simply be what they are supposed to be? Next, they will tell me that Grass Court is not a place where people smoke grass or that Love-all has nothing to do with romance or Greeks……..


Chitra said...

Hyuck hyuck.....sakkath PJs!

Usha said...

wow... so many facts I didnt know. A lot of it makes sense now.. lol

Lalita said...

Reading your blog is an education, definitely. :D

Raj said...

Chitra, Usha, Lalita : Thanks, always glad to educate.

Anu said...

here is a trivia I picked up which you will enjoy:
"During the 1987 Wimbledon men's singles final, while the match was in progress, a fan held up a sign reading "Cash is better than a Czech", a play on the nationality of the eventual loser (Ivan Lendl)."
btw, How would a Bengali pronounce Ivanisevic?

Kurur said...

If someone actually pronounces Boris Becker as "Bore-is Becker" he has to be a mallu!

Raj said...

Kurur, I quote from one of your posts :"And mallus, not known for being too jingoistic about their identity or conscious about their idiosyncracies, are always game for self-derision".

Kurur said...

oops.. when will i learn to be like my mallu brethren and "sistren".. ;-)

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